Pamela Anderson

Pamela Anderson is just weeks away from opening up about her life in an upcoming memoir, Love, Pamela, and Netflix documentary, Pamela, A Love Story, both out on Jan. 31. Leading up to the release, the actress shared an excerpt from the memoir detailing her relationship with rockstar Tommy Lee.

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“My relationship with Tommy may have been the only time I was ever truly in love,” she wrote in the passage, shared on Wednesday (Jan. 18) by People. The couple was married in 1995 in Cancun, and during their time together, Anderson said the duo “had fun and our rule was no rules.”

However, when their personal tapes were stolen from their garage and then made into a “sex tape” for sale, things began to go south. “It ruined lives, starting with our relationship — and it’s unforgivable that people, still to this day, think they can profit from such a terrible experience, let alone a crime,” Anderson wrote.

The couple share two sons, 26-year-old Brandon and 25-year-old Dylan, and the pressure started to infiltrate the relationship. In 1998, Anderson said she was holding then-seven-month-old Dylan one night, when Lee twisted her arm.  “Tommy ripped Brandon off me and threw me and Dylan into a wall,” she wrote, noting that she went on to call 911. Lee was then arrested and served six months in jail. Anderson soon filed for divorce.

“The divorce from Tommy was the hardest, lowest, most difficult point of my life,” she wrote. “I was crushed. I still couldn’t believe that the person I loved the most was capable of what had happened that night. We were both devastated, but I had to protect my babies.”

However, she and Lee still “check in, every once in a while.” She added, “Tommy is the father of my kids and I’m forever grateful.”