Music

Trigger warning: the following story contains descriptions of sexual assault.

In an emotional TikTok video posted over the weekend, former Drake & Josh star Drake Bell shared that a ballad from his 2005 debut album Telegraph, entitled “In the End,” featured lyrics alluding to his sexual abuse at the hands of Nickelodeon dialogue coach Brian Peck. That abuse was explored in the recent docuseries Quiet on the Set: The Dark Side of Kids TV, which chronicled stories of emotional abuse and traumatic experiences suffered by teen and tween actors on the sets of a variety of Nickelodeon programs.

“Wrote this song when I was 15 about what happened before I said anything to anyone,” Bell captioned the one-minute video, in which he sits with a forlorn, pained look as the song’s emotional lyrics play out. “Wake up/ It’s time to get your things together and drive away/ ‘Breathe out, future days will treat you better’/ That’s what they say,” he sings. “Another day gone without a say/ But it’s okay if you turn around/ And feel the memories bringin’ you down.”

The song’s lyrics never appear to explicitly mention abuse, but the chorus (not included in Bell’s video) hints at dark themes. “Wake up/ The monsters in your head have left you/ All to yourself, it’s alright/ If ugly little things remind you of how it felt,” he sings, adding, “Another day, no one tells you what it means/ What’s in your way and poisonin’ your dreams/ The darkest place that you’ve ever been.”

Bell, now 37, detailed his abuse for the first time in the four-part series that plumbed the toxic work environment at the Viacom children’s network on sets run by Dan Schneider, creator of such hit programs as Drake & Josh, The Amanda Show, Zoey 101, iCarly, Victorious and Sam & Cat, which launched the careers of such superstars as Ariana Grande, Amanda Bynes, Kenan Thompson, Victoria Justice and more.

In the series, Bell discussed his abuse by Peck — who was convicted of sexually assaulting a Nickelodeon child actor (Bell) in 2004 — for the first time, alongside other then-underage actor’s stories alleging abuse, sexism, racism and inappropriate alleged predatory behavior at the network.

Peck was convicted in 2004, a year before Bell’s debut album was released and several years after authorities said the abuse of the then 14/15-year-old actor took place. Peck was accused of molesting a child in 2003 and later convicted of a lewd act against a child and oral copulation of a person under 16 — resulting in a 16-month sentence and registration as a sex offender.

“Now that Drake Bell has disclosed his identity as the plaintiff in the 2004 case, we are dismayed and saddened to learn of the trauma he has endured, and we commend and support the strength required to come forward,” Nickelodeon said in a statement to The Hollywood Reporter prior to the series’ debut earlier this month.

Bell is slated to release his sixth studio album, Non-Stop Flight, later this year. The video for the album’s power pop first single, “I Kind of Relate,” features scenes that directly allude to the abuse some other difficult chapters in the singer/actor’s personal life. “I kind of relate
I found beauty in my pain/ I’m running away/ From the abuse and all the shame,” he sings on the Beach Boys-esque tune. “‘Cause no one comes/ To my house anymore/ No one knocks on my door.”

Watch Bell’s TikTok video below.

Stories about sexual assault allegations can be traumatizing for survivors of sexual assault. If you or anyone you know needs support, you can reach out to the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network (RAINN). The organization provides free, confidential support to sexual assault victims. Call RAINN’s National Sexual Assault Hotline (800.656.HOPE) or visit the anti-sexual violence organization’s website for more information.